Lousy Musings of a Star-Studded Cowboy

 “Shine as if you live in the dark.”

Drop the noos. I refuse to burn.

My sweat drips from fingers and my tongue.  Your taste lingers through my lungs.

Maybe it’s time to live.

What is the love we deserve and who can give it to us?

I’ve carried it with me my whole life.

Tough way to go out 

 Peace everlasting.

 I’m losing my head, I think I already lost my heart. It’s all just been so frustrating lately.

It was just me.

I’ve gotten dull. Lazy. I need to take back control. It’s embarrassing how easily I’ve slipped into bad habits. Right now I’m not worthy of it. Love, existing, all of it. If I don’t take it back, if I don’t change things, I’ll stay like this forever. That’s my biggest fear. I can’t be me forever.  

What is real anymore? Her feelings weren’t I guess.

Sitting on my thumbs it’s a common choice of no choice. Everything blurs together just looks darker and darker. Why must so much of my life fail downwards? Must it? The type of tired I feel, is something that you just don’t get used to

As much as it hurts. I am alive.

My eyes my teeth my sweat. I let it all out I sweat it all out. I tear away the things that are and aren’t me. There’s nothing left to begin with. It’s not quite a rebuilding but maybe a restart. 

Ours. It’s something we have to make together.

So below. I can feel myself sinking. Everything’s shifting, I never knew how to adapt to all the changes. Maybe my biggest flaw was that I never adapted with them, moved besides them. I was always the one to fight against the current.

I’m someone important! I matter!  The silence was a reply in and of itself. 

The world changes the people we are, or do we change the world to accommodate us? It’s a mix of both, but when is a choice a choice? It’s so hard to tell what’s in your control, to look at everything within your grasp. Slipping away is easy. Before you even notice it, the things you once focused so strongly on, they’re gone. If you lose it that easily, does it even matter? How can you say that you ever cared? 

I thought you had started to finally start to feel me.

Stripped so beautifully naked, but still cold compared to the warmth of your inside glow. I don’t take any of it for granted, I see it all replaying inside my mind.

I’m running that race. I have to go the distance.

Love runs deep. The devil is always busy. 

 Rahhh

Respect me and my space. All I want to do is have fun with my friends and spread love.

She’s mean but it’s part of the way she shows love. She knows love.

It’s a relationship between us that we take day by day.

Human rays beaming me up transforming me slowly. I it all up above, as the earth melts slowly.